How to deal with the giant zucchini in your life.

Some people grow giant zucchinis in their gardens. Some people have giant zucchinis foisted upon them. So, now what? Here are some tips for any zucchini-hugeness crisis you may be undergoing.

1. Do this immediately: write a note to yourself and put it somewhere where you won’t miss it. “HARVEST ZUCCHINI!!!” That’s so you won’t miss the next one, as it doubles, triples and fourples in size. Then one day you may actually harvest a nice, normal sized zucchini. Delicious, aren’t they?

2. Hollow out the centre and make a small canoe. Or, make this zucchini boat recipe.

3. Save for Hallowe’en, and make a Zucchini-O-Lantern. Then your pumpkin will have a tall, skinny friend.

4. Cut in horizontal chunks and make (temporary) stepping stones for your garden. Or, perhaps try this zucchini brownie recipe.

5. Paint it gold, to make an elegant door stop, or a minimalist art piece. Or, try this mouthwatering-looking zucchini and sweet potato latkes recipe.